In the news, The Mall of America was choosen as the location of the Mall Walkers Senior Olympics this year. Seniors will be competing at malls all over the country to qualify to compete in the Senior Olympics. This year events will include Toddlers jumping, 100 yard dash to the rest room and the obsticle course, in which contestants will have to weave thru a crowd of shoppers to get to the sale at CVS Drug Store, bumping into a shopper will result in point reduction, making a shopper drop their bags will result in diqualification. A new event this year will be the baby carriage hurdle in which contestants will have to complete a 10 lap race around the mall during which a baby carriage could be pushed in front of them at any time. The contestant much hurdle over the carriage with out swearing at the carriage pusher.

    To qualify check with the management of your local mall to get the date of qualifying events. Be sure to bring a letter from you doctor verifying physical fittness.

    In other news, A Moose Poose has escaped from Arcadia park in Maine and has been spoted in Crawford Texas where it has been seen courting a texas long horn steer. Fish and Game officials report that the steer does not seem interested at this time but the Moose Poose keeps trying. Jed Deeppockets, the fish and game official said it's the damnest thing he ever saw. The Moose Poose get up on its back legs and it wiggles its butt and its currly tail straightens out and it makes a sound kind of like a combination of a pig and a goose, I guess you'd call it a hoink.He said we'll give it a couple of day while we decide what to do with it..  

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