IN THE NEWS.

        In the news, A new tax bill was voted on today the proceeds of which will be used to pay for repairs to our states highways. The new bill passed means every licensed driver in the state will be billed ONE THOUSAND DOLLARS for speeding tickets they never received. According to a spokesperson for state the state does not have enough troopers to patrol it's highways so to recover the lost revenue from the traffic fines that should have been handed out the state Will be mailing tax bills to all licensed drivers. 

        In other news, Santa at a news conference yesterday stated that he won't be making his journey around the world on Christmas eve He stated that he has already ordered every thing on his list from various stores on line and they guarantee him they would be delivered on Christmas. If all goes according to plan he will be laying off his elves and retire to a warmer climate